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I would also like to thank Sue and John for the most wonderful stimulating course I went to in a very long time. It was well organised - everything was so well done. Thank you for your hard work! I really appreciate it. I have learnt a lot in these two weeks!! |
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What is Mediation?
Mediation involves families in conflict working out arrangements for themselves and their children with the help of neutral and skilled mediators. The aim of mediation is to reach an agreement which is mutually acceptable to the parties within the broad range of that which a court would be likely to approve.
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Does Mediation discourage Reconciliation?
Couples often disagree about the need for separation or divorce. Mediators neither encourage divorce nor press people to continue their relationship. Mediation must not be confused with couple counselling or marital therapy. Mediators encourage couples to reach joint decisions wherever possible and may sometimes refer couples or their children for therapy or counselling.
Are Separate Attorneys Still Necessary?
Mediation is not a substitute for legal advice as mediators neither advise nor represent the participants. Any agreement reached during mediation is to be taken for independent legal advice by the participants. It can then be formalized into a legally binding agreement.
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Workshop 1 October 2011-09-30
Some of the references:
Malcolm Gladwell:
“The 10 000 hour rule”
(“In Hamburg we had to play for eight hours”)
Ch 2 in Outliers – the Story of Success Allen Lane 2008, London
“The ethnic theory of plane crashes”
(“Captain, the weather radar has helped us a lot.”)
Ch 7 in Outliers – the Story of Success Allen Lane 2008, London
“What the dog saw”
(“Cesar Millan and the movements of mastery”)
In Part 1 of What the Dog Saw Allen Lane 2009, London
“Contributions of Caucusing and Pre-Caucusing to Mediation”
Gregorio Billikopf-Encina
Group Facilitation – a Research and Applications Journal – Number 4 Spring 2002 Page 3
http://nature.berkeley.edu/ucce50/ag-labor/7research/Pre-Caucus2.pdf |
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How Long does Mediation Take? |
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Each mediation session usually lasts two hours. The number of sessions needed depends on the nature of the problems - generally 3 to 6 sessions are necessary. The charges for mediation sessions are payable at the end of each session. Responsibility for payment of mediation fees may be shared between the parties in any way they may agree. |
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What Problems can be Brought to Mediation? |
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Any or all of the problems that arise when couples split up can be brought to mediation:
* Arrangements which concern the children, such as drawing up a parenting plan which would include contact and care arrangements.
* Maintenance – child and spousal
* Property and financial matters. |
Although mediators can act individually, experience has shown that mediation in the divorce / separation field is most effectively dealt with by two mediators who work together as a team. One is an experienced family lawyer and the other an experienced professional trained in marital and family work, usually a psychologist or a social worker. The mediation team provides objectivity, experience and expertise.
The mediators help couples resolve the legal and financial issues as well as reach agreement regarding arrangements for the children. The mediation process enables the couple to reach a lasting agreement and avoids the polarization often caused by the divorce / separation. |
Divorce or separation usually involves a major crisis for a family. Arrangements for children, housing, financial and property matters all need to be decided upon. There may be a lot of anger between the parties as well as great distress.
Divorcing and separating couples often want to avoid contested court proceedings - which can escalate hostility and be very prolonged and costly, both emotionally and financially - but in the strained circumstances it is often impossible for the couple to work things out on their own.
To overcome this situation, trained mediators work together with the couple, their role being to reduce conflict by helping the couple to consider the issues that need to be settled and the various options that may be available to them to facilitate reaching agreement. They help couples work towards financial settlements and focus on the needs of the children, encouraging parental cooperation wherever possible.
The mediation is able to be terminated at any stage if any participant feels that mediation is inappropriate or that no further progress can be made. |
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